Quick note: Below I'm using the terms optimistic and pessimistic in the way that most people tend to think of those words. Optimistic being positive and having a good outlook, pessimistc being more negative and a not so good outlook. They are not being used in the correct psychological way.

Now that I have a little time, or more that I'm putting off studying spanish and AP, I can talk some more about last night and the conclusion that I am actually an optimistic person. It started out with Bea-hob asking me why I always hated everything after I told him that I hate physics. I told him that it's not actually that I hate things, that is just the easiest answer to give at the moment and usually I'm not very fond of whatever it is. It's the slacker way out. That transitioned into us talking about personality. I said that I was a pessimistic optimistic person in that outwardly I usually sound pessimistic and try and perpare myself for the worst, but deep down I'm actually pretty optimistic and believe that everything will turn out okay, even pretty good. The reason that I don't say that out loud, or let myself think that in my head, is that I find it much easier to expect the worst and find out everything is just fine, rather than expect the best and be let down or dissapointed. Bea-hob told me that this meant that I had a deceptive personality. I asked Josh and Justin about it as well, and they both said it was deceptives due to the fact that I outwordly say something other than what I really feel deep down. I'd never really though of it that way and I didn't like it, so I decided it was time to put aside the pessimistic outward attitude and start focusing on the optimistic one. It's requiring a little more concentration on what I'm saying and thinking, but overall I think it's going pretty well so far.