Friday, December 28, 2007

Change

Change. I do not deal very well with change, especially when I am not able to ease in to it. Last year when it was nearing the end of my tour in Iraq I dreaded coming home. It was not that I enjoyed being in Iraq, but it was what I knew. The thought of the all the changes that lay ahead terrified me. Looking back I can see many instances where I was terrified of the changes that lay ahead. One was the change of command midway through Beast. Though my squad did not particularly like our first squad leader I was not looking forward to the switch to a new squad leader because it would be adjusting to a new person, who could be better or worse then the first. Turns out we liked our second squad leader a lot better.


When I go home I always imagine that it'll be a sort of escape for the hectic life I currently live and all the changes that lay ahead. I get sucked into thinking I'll be returning to the the comfort and familiarity of the life I left behind....but I don't. I come home to change. Lots of change. Life has moved on since I left. The house is nearly always different in some way when I come home, be it a change in a room's décor, or just new dinner plates. The neighborhood's changed with new houses being built in the fields I used to escape to for solitude. People have changed, gotten older, gotten married, lived their lives. At least when I am back where I live in Texas I have gotten used to the familiarity of my surroundings and can slowly adjust to the changes as they happen because I am present to watch them. When I come home to Michigan it is like being hit with a million changes all at once and nothing is familiar.


I noticed over Thanksgiving that I had a somewhat hard time while I was home, but then when was in Minnesota my mood and outlook was vastly improved. Perhaps it was because I had no expectations for the familiar since it was my first time visiting Betsy and Mark. I was not constantly surrounded by reminders of all that I have missed in the time I've been away and all that has changed. I could truly relax because I was not trying to reconcile my memories of the past with the state of the present.


Change is not bad, but it is overwhelming at times.

Monday, December 10, 2007

Fast Forward

10-21DEC07: Out in the "field" flying with my platoon.
24DEC-02JAN07: Home on leave
06JAN-15FEB07: Fort Leavenworth, KS for a 6 week course.
Very Early March: Deploy to Iraq
 
My life is suddenly moving very fast.  Sweet.
 
I am still running, but I'm too lazy to sit down and log it into my computer.  I also haven't been running as much recently and when I do run it is at a much slower pace. 
 
I am most likely going to become Catholic sometime here in the near future. 
 
Congratulations Uncle Dave and Debbie on your three new babies! 
 
Have I mentioned that I'd like to get married, settle down, and raise a family?  In the mean time I'll make the most of my all expense paid trip to the desert.  It's about the same, right?  Family vs.  War...they both have the letter A in the words, and the words are also composed of letters in the english alphabet.  Yes, the similarities between the two are quite stunning. I definetly could mix them up if I'm not careful.   

Sunday, November 18, 2007

LOT'S OF SLEEP

Apparently I was more tired than I thought after watching the game yesterday. I went to bed around 2:45 PM because I hadn't done more than doze a tiny bit the night before and thought a nap would do me some good. Although I usually go to a Bible Study at 7 PM on Saturday nights, I figured I'd most likely wake up on my own before then and so I didn't set an alarm. So much for that idea. My radio turned on by itself at 9:30 pm and woke me up for the first time. I figured that since I had just slept for 6.5 hours I wouldn't be able to get back to sleep for awhile. About 30 minutes later I went back to bed and shortly thereafter fell asleep again. I woke up once just long enough to check the clock and saw that it was 6:30 AM, and then next time I woke up was my alarm going off at 7:45 AM. Totaling all of that up I slept for almost 17 hours.

Saturday, November 17, 2007

Staff Duty


Last night I had staff duty once again. Though as the officer on duty I am allowed to rest, I can never manage to get any good sleep. I spent almost the whole night sitting at my desk in the office either reading, surfing the internet, watching movies, or dozing in my chair. It tends to get quite cold in there at night and the above picture is of me sitting at my desk around 1:30 AM trying to stay warm. What is not visible is that underneath the fleece jacket I am wearing a t-shirt, wool sweater, and the ACU top, as well as wool gloves on my hands. Though I managed to stay warmer than any other time I've been on Staff Duty, I was still a bit cold at times. The Soldiers on duty laughed at me at first when they saw me wearing all that clothing, but when I went to check on them later on during the night they saying that they were freezing. Trying to adjust the thermostats does nothing.

Currently I am wide awake, but I'll probably crash shortly after the big game is over since I haven't done more than an hour of dozing in the past 30 hours.

Friday, November 16, 2007

Away Message

My friend Jon to requested that my away message on IM would, "bring a small tear to my [his] eye -- but not one that actually makes a tear fall out," and use "big words; colorful ones," so I came up with this away message:
"This Turquoise person is off to her Navajo White church small group where she will have a very Chartreuse, Magenta, Fuschia, and Aquamarine dinner and then a SandyBrown Bible Study.

Remember that time you spilled milk when you were a kid? It's okay to tear up at the memory."
I know it does not make any sense, but that's part of the charm. He liked it, so I guess that's all that really matters.

Saturday, November 10, 2007

Venting

This may sound very weird, but sometimes, such as right now, I wish I could call someone on the phone and stay on the phone with them but not have either of us talk. No chit-chat, no catching up on how friends/relatives/whoever are doing, no talking about what's on our mind, nothing. Even better would be to have someone here in person and for them to put their arm around me and neither of us talk, just sit there and do nothing. I don't know why this is so appealing but it's not the first time I've wished it were possible.

An event with one of my Soldier's two days ago threw me for a loop and ever since then I've been an emotional wreck. It's like a huge weight suddenly descended upon me. Now all I can think about is going on leave in a week and hoping that I can hold myself together until then. I failed horribly at that today and it was quite embarrassing. Usually I can control my emotions pretty well, especially when in uniform. However, yesterday and today I wasn't in uniform at work due to a course, Applied Suicide Intervention Training (ASIST), I was attending. There was a portion of the course today where we role-played a scenario in front of the group, and my scenario didn't go too well. I was never able to connect with the person who was suicidal and so it was quite awkward throughout the whole thing. Afterwards I felt I'd failed in my scenario and the instructor saw that and so he came over to talk to me when he put everyone on break. He was telling me that I didn't fail and even did okay and even though I was trying with all my might to hold them back the tears started coming and for the life of me I could not stop them. Even though he said it was okay to cry and even said that he was glad to see me cry because it showed I really did care I felt extremely stupid and unprofessional sitting there crying and wished I could stop.

This weekend is a four day weekend for Veterans Day with Monday and Tuesday off, but tomorrow I am the Staff Duty Officer for both my Brigade and Battalion, so I'll be awake and at work from 8 am Saturday to 9 am Sunday and then mostly likely sleep all day Sunday. The person who has duty on Tuesday called me today and offered me $150 to take his shift, but I said no because I'm hoping that I'll figure out some way to relax on Monday and Tuesday and be able to go back to work a bit more refreshed on Wednesday.

Calvin's been his usual self recently. Yesterday my roommate's friends were over at the house and one of them brought her dog. I was home alone with the dogs and when I was in the bathroom brushing my teeth as I got ready for bed and out of the corner of my eye I saw Calvin run past the door with something in his mouth. From his behavior I could tell he was trying to hide something, so I immediately went to find him. Since I didn't see him in the living room I went straight to looking under Karen's bed, since that's Calvin's favorite hiding spot when he has something he knows he has something he's not supposed to have. He was under there chewing on a toy stuffed monkey that belonged to the other dog. When I tried to grab it from him he would scoot out the other side of the bed. After a couple failed attempts I climbed on top of the bed and a few seconds later I saw his nose and the monkey poke out from under the bed. He let go of the monkey just long enough for me to snatch it from him. It was rather funny to see only his snout poking out from under the bed sniffing around trying to locate the monkey while the rest of him was still hidden. After he realized the monkey was no longer there he slowly crawled out from under the bed with a guilty look on his face. There have been a couple other instances since then with him, but this post is already long enough.

Monday, November 05, 2007

Calvin...

Yesterday Jordan and Zack had Zuleka, George, and myself over to watch the Army vs Airforce football game on TV. I'd told Jordan that I'd bring dessert, since she was ordering the pizza and Zuleka said she'd bring something. Earlier in the week I'd made mini-cheesecakes to take to Bible Study, but had extra cookie dough shells that I hadn't used, so I planned to put them to use and take the mini-cheesecakes to the party, along with Sweet Crunchies (aka, peanut butter chewies). I'd placed the cookies in a plastic container with a lid on the kitchen counter and thought they were far enough back so that they were out of Calvin's reach. To my knowledge, he left them alone all week and so I thought nothing of leaving them out where they were.
Saturday morning I went out for a long fartleck run and during the run kept thinking about how grateful I was that the cookie crust portion of the cheesecakes were already done because I wouldn't have much time after my run to shower, bake, and then drive over the Jordan's before the game started. Unfortunatly, Calvin had other ideas.
When I got back to the house I was walking through the living room to get to the kitchen when glaced over on the floor and saw a plastic container on the ground that looked strikingly similar to the container that the cookie's had been in. Upon picking it up and seeing what appeared to be a couple of cookie crumbs in the bottom of it, I quickly peered into the kitchen and saw that the container on the counter was no longer there. Upon yelling his name, Calvin sauntered into the room with a stupid grin on his face and procceed to come up to me as if to say, "want to play?"
I did have to start from scratch with the mini-cheesecakes, but they are increadibly easy to make and it turned out that I could the sweet crunchies at the same time, so not too much time was lost.
Though he tests my patience more and more each day and I find myself sternly saying his name and telling him 'no' more than any other living creature I've ever come across, he is still lovable. I should probably go take him for a walk now or else he'll keep my roommate and I up all night like he did last night because he was moving around and making a ton of noise in the middle of the night.

Tuesday, October 30, 2007

Title?

    Where do I start with this entry?  Do I even want to start?  That's another good question.  I'm tired and my roommate's dog, Calvin, is barking again.  I thought I liked dogs, and then I met Calvin.  Granted, I do like Calvin, but he's an excellent reminder for me of why I am glad I do not have a dog, let alone a child.  I don't have the will or energy to give him the attention he needs and wants.  For instance, I came home from work today and the only thing I wanted to do was go for a bike ride.  It was all I could think about this afternoon.  Had I not run a half-marathon yesterday I most likely would've wanted to go for a run instead, but the bike ride was a good substitute. 
    When I entered the house around 6:30 pm it was clear that Karen, my roommate who owns Calvin, had not come home from school yet and that Calvin was very lonely.  My other roommate, Maggie, had just arrived home and so we were both trying to unload our things while Calvin was jumping all over us and getting in the way of everything. I played with him for a few minutes, but I was still determined to go for the bike ride. He got all excited when he saw that I was putting on exercise clothes and then looked a bit sad when I closed the front door without taking him with me outside.  The bike ride was nice and relaxing, but when I got home Calvin was even more hyper and Karen still wasn't home.  Maggie had gone out for a run and so Calvin had been all alone again.  I felt bad and also didn't want to deal with an extremely hyper dog all evening, so I took him for a short walk.  After that he did calm down a bit, although he still had enough energy to try and get to the food on the counters, jump on my bed, and find doors I forgot to close and examine any trash in the trashcan in that room.  I think the phrase I say to him the most is, "No! Calvin." 
    How do other people handle the constant demands on time and energy?  Work leaves me exhausted even though I don't think I've done or accomplished much at all, and I can't imagine coming home and having more people vying for attention. 
    My need to unwind, and inability to do so right now, surfaced again unexpectedly when I was home for Heidi's wedding.  I thought my random and unexplainable breaking down crying was finished after R&R and right after I came home from Iraq, but it occurred within an hour of me arriving home for the wedding.  I was standing in the living room when all of a sudden I started crying, and by crying I mean bawling, without any cause or reason behind it.  As usual, it frightened me a bit which made it even worse.  When it occurred I didn't want anyone to see me in that state, but when I thought I was finally regaining control someone would find me and start talking to me about something completely unrelated, which proceeded to set the waterworks off again (usually after they left).  The whole scenario repeated itself a few more times over the course of the weekend and I did my best to duck out of sight when it occurred.  Hopefully the road trip home will allow me sufficient time to unwind before I arrive in Michigan and Thanksgiving will be better. 
    I recently realized that I rarely smile at work.  The most I've smiled recently was when the Family Readiness Group hosted a party for the children of the Soldiers in my company and I was in the room watching all the kids play and make photo frames with their parents.  I had a grin plastered on my face the whole time, and a real grin, not a fake one at that.  Once the party was over and we had to get back to work my smile walked out the door with the kids. 
 

Sunday, October 14, 2007

It's a Boy!

Betsy's having a boy :)  I'm so excited about my nephew. 

Wednesday, September 05, 2007

Sleep

I just slept for 14 hours :)

Breath of Fresh Air

This afternoon I got back from NTC and though I was glad to be back there was still a weight on me that I couldn't shake.  I also realized that I was fast approaching another point where it is either I engage the world or it engages me.  In order to combat both matters I tried to contact some women from church to see if anyone was free for dinner.  Unfortunately, nobody was free or they weren't home.  Still needing some support, I ended up calling Mike, but he didn't answer when I called.  Later in the afternoon, however, he called me back and I asked if I could go hang out with him at his house for a bit.  He was fine with that and so I went over around eight thinking that I would just use him as a listening ear. It turns out that when I got over there he was watching a video of a debate between a creationist (www.drdino.com) and an evolutionist. We ended up not talking much at all except to make occasional comments about the debate, but I left feeling more refreshed then I have in a long time.  The debate was extremely interesting, except for the evolutionist was a joke and never made a solid argument or had a straightforward answer to any questions.  The breath of fresh air for me was being around someone who is extremely passionate about Christ and sharing it with others (Mike), and the intellectual stimulation and thought provoking arguments that came about in the video.  I left feeling excited and wanting to dive into Scripture again.
 
 

Tuesday, August 07, 2007

Taji

A couple nights ago I had a dream that I was at home on leave, but instead of getting ready to go to NTC on Friday I was instead getting ready to deploy back to Iraq on Friday. In my dream I was talking to someone about it and the reality of going back to Taji for 15 months was sinking in during the dream. I don't mind going back, but what I am dreading is being there for 15 months. Last year around this time I was starting the countdown to coming home because it seemed like it was almost around the corner. Realizing that the unit that replaced us still has a long ways to go blows my mind. I think have about four months left in the states, but the months have been speeding up recently because there is so much to do an so little time. I wonder if once I get back to Taji it'll feel like I ever even left. I can still picture almost every detail of my run routes around the camp, the faces of the workers at the laundry facility, all of the ied hot spots on a map in MND-B (though I'm sure they've changed over the past year), the long stretches of commo blackouts, the Tigris River Chapel and the airfield gym. It's still all so recent in my memory. I was a fobbit last year and so, for the most part, all I knew was the camp. This coming tour I will start out as a fobbit given the mission of my platoon, but I don't know what position I'll be in later on in the rotation. Will I still confuse the sound of a controlled det or an ied blowing up off in the distance with the sound of a garage door closing? For some reason they sounded very similar to me and so when I heard the detonations I immediately thought of the garage door at home closing. It still hasn't completely sunk in yet that I'll be back there before the end of the year.

Friday, July 27, 2007

I've Changed

I keep thinking about writing in here, but often it is pessimistic rantings and so I refrain. I also don't have the time or creative energy to write. I don't have a lot of time or energy to do much of anything anymore. It's gotten to the point where I am looking forward to getting back to Iraq because right now things back here seem a lot more demanding and crazy than life over there. It stinks to be here with things the way they are, and it stinks to be there, but I'd rather be in Iraq.

I realized a couple weeks ago that I am no where near ready to get married, nor do I even want to consider being in a relationship right now. Finally admitting that was rather freeing. The scary thing is that I was reading a few blogs today written by women a few years older then me who have kids, and the idea of being a wife and mother was something that seemed so overwhelming and exhausting that it lost it's appeal to me. Maybe I will just stay single. My reasons for wanting to remain single aren't good at all and seem quite selfish. I like my sleep, space, personal time, quiet, and ability to crash on the weekend and not move from my bed for most of the day because I'm so worn out. The last one, not being able to move from my bed, is not something I actually enjoy because I'd rather have the energy to move, but right now I have the freedom to stay and bed and not move because I have no energy.

Tuesday, July 17, 2007

SHADOW TUAV


These are a couple pictures of Shadow Tactical Unmanned Aerial Vehicles that my platoon operates. We finally had good weather for 4 days straight last week and got in some flights.

On a completly different note, CONGRATULATIONS BETSY AND MARK!!! I can't wait to meet my niece or nephew:)

Tuesday, July 03, 2007

Friday, June 22, 2007

Thinking

There are times that I wish I knew without a doubt that I was outwardly ugly, because then I would also know that if a guy were ever to be attracted to me it would be because the part of me he likes most is who I am as a person instead of how I look on the outside.

Saturday, June 16, 2007

Crossing The Finish Line


Here I am crossing the finish line at the marathon. The time reflected is not my chip time but the time of the marathon. My chip time was a little over 10 min faster.
Yesterday I tried to go for a run, but experienced some lower back pain that I haven't had before and so I turned around after 2 blocks. It felt like cramps in my lower back because it was more of an ache than a sharp pain and would disappear when I walked. Perhaps I need to stretch my hamstrings more or something.

Thursday, June 14, 2007

Rambelings

At times I feel so old and like I have far to much responsibility for a 23 year-old, and then at other times I feel incredibly young and immature for my 23 years of age.  It boggles my mind that I am leading more than 20 soldiers, some whom have over a decade more experience in the military than myself, and overall responsible and accountable for somewhere between 2-10 million of dollars worth of equipment.  Thankfully, my platoon sergeant is awesome and I lean on him heavily.  It's in the military setting, due to the magnitude of responsibility and constant demands, that I feel older than 23.  Outside the military, when interacting with my non-military peers in a social setting, especially when they are married, I feel incredibly young. 
 
I used to want kids, but I'm never around them and now they intimidate me.  I don't know how to interact with them.  I still love kids and wish I was better with them, but I have no clue what to do.  Truthfully, I see a kid and I distance myself from them now.  It may sound weird, but the reason I back off from them is that I don't want them to make it blatantly obvious that they don't like me and I'm not good with them. 
 
Someday I want to taste success for more than a single day.  I want to be in a place where I don't feel guilty if I go home at night even though I worked 12-14 hours that day;  A place in life where I'm not constantly hanging on by my fingertips trying to juggle all the glass balls and then having more thrown into the mix at any given momement;  Where I am making a difference and sharing Christ with people; A place where I can actually be and feel like a woman;  A place that I smile more than I frown;  A place where I know what I am doing and am comfertable instead of always flying by the seat of my pants; A place where there is hope;  A place where individual people matter more than numbers and statistics;  a place where people are taught to love one another.  Does such a place exist?

Friday, June 08, 2007

Late Night Thoughts

Bold Color Dry Erase….Thus claims the EXPO dry erase marker that is on the table in front of me. I wonder how well it would sell if perhaps instead of "bold," the color were pegged as "audacious" or perhaps "daring." I can easily understand why the manufactures choose to call the color bold over my two suggestions, but why must the color of the marker even be marked as bold in the first place? Are there colors that are not bold? Looking at the end result of the marker on paper, to me the color appears to be a normal orange hue. In fact, it reminds me of an orange creamsicle. Would I call a creamsicle bold? Probably not, though they are quite tasty.

Now you may be wondering what has provoked me to write about a phrase on a dry erase marker, especially at 1:00 AM, though I don't expect to post this entry for quite a while so I can not expect you to know that it is currently 1:00 AM. Whether or not you know the exact time that I am writing this entry is of little consequence, and my reason for writing is of no more importance either. The reason for my writing is that I am on Brigade Staff Duty and awaiting the time to do my after-midnight checks of the BDE footprint. Being that it is after midnight at the moment, I could knock out the checks right now, but that would leave me with a good chunk of time afterwards when I doubt I'd have the mental capacity to contemplate such highly stimulating things as bold color dry erase markers. Of note, these particular markers are certified AP Nontoxic. I feel much safer knowing that a certain Ian M. could chew on as many of these markers for as long as he like without any damage due to toxins. I say his name because I recall a certain day long ago when my Mom was picking him up at his house for one thing or another and he came out to the car with his teeth a rather striking shade of purple, or some other equally bold color. He had discovered the markers that smell like fruit and decided to taste them. Though I am sure I outwardly acted as if he was an idiot for doing so, inwardly I wished that I could do the same because they did smell rather enticing. I have done my fair share of voluntarily tasting different substances in my youth, such as hand soap. I do not recommend anyone else try it. I am told that I once tasted bird droppings, though I do not recall doing so and do not wish to repeat that taste testing.

Having covered bold markers and taste testing quite thoroughly, it is now time to move on to another topic. In recent weeks my life has consisted of 13+ hour work days, 5 days a week, with weekends taken up moving or with more work related things. There have been some major changes, such as my old roommate getting out of the army and moving away, resulting in my moving into a new place with two new roommates, though one has yet to arrive. I do not handle change well, and with the constant demands at work, a lack of exercise/running, and dealing with moving into a new place, my outlook spiraled downward. My trip to San Diego and running the marathon proved to boost my mood for a couple days, but already the downward spiral has returned.

Running a marathon is something I never imagined I could accomplish until less than 5 months ago. Had my friend Lindsay not been the one to suggest it in the first place as a way for us to briefly hang out again after almost a year, I probably never would have run one. Now that I have run one and come to the conclusion that almost anyone can finish a marathon if they have enough determination, I think I want to run another one. Though my goal was just to finish and I told myself I wouldn't care about the time, I know that I can do better than my 5:02:10 if can manage to be more consistent in my training and also run a smarter race. Although my training this last time was sub-standard, it must have worked a little because my muscle and joint soreness was nowhere near the level I expected after the marathon, and today I was not sore at all. Were I not on BDE Staff Duty tonight I would have tried to go for a 2 mile jog this evening. Yes, it would have been very light and easy. Two nights ago I looked up post-marathon recovery information and today was the first day they listed as it being okay for me to do a light jog. Since I couldn't go for the run, I went for an 800m swim at lunch instead. I do not know if I will be able to run another marathon before I deploy due to 4 weeks of NTC in AUG/SEP messing up training time for another one. I will never be a fast runner, but I can always compete against myself.

Sunday, May 27, 2007

The News Story

Tornado wreaks havoc in Killeen Posted on: Saturday, May 26, 2007 By Kevin M. Smith
Killeen Daily Herald


A small tornado made a brief touchdown in Killeen on Friday afternoon, terrorizing residents of an apartment complex and some houses on the eastern edge of town.

"We're the lucky ones – the Dumpster didn't land in our living room," Martina Herrera said.

Herrera's husband, Antonio, was sitting on the patio of their apartment a little after 5 p.m. Sunday when he saw the small tornado rip through the parking lot. Antonio rushed into his apartment, where his wife was making sandwiches and a friend was using the computer.

"It sounded like a train was going through our apartment," Martina said.

They huddled in the bathroom for about 30 seconds as the twister – about 300 feet from their building –

tossed dumpsters and other debris around the complex. It peeled off the top layer of several apartment building roofs, knocking down air conditioner units and moving cars.

Martina said they had no idea it was coming.

"We didn't get a warning here, and here it comes," she said.

Martina said the lights went out about a minute and a half before the tornado hit.

Then the Herreras had some options: sleep on the floor with no electricity in an empty apartment in their complex, stay at their current apartment with no electricity or go to the Killeen Community Center. They said they wanted to stay in their wet apartment to ensure there was no looting.

"We've been flooded and tornadoed in 24 hours," Martina said.

Martina's friend, Andrea Jacobs, is from California. This was her first tornado.

"It got quiet and it felt weird," said Jacobs, who has lived in Killeen about a year.

That's when Antonio rushed into the room to tell them there was a tornado.

Glenn Maddox was coming home in time to watch it rip the roof off his second-story apartment.

"I've been through a couple," Maddox said.

He was taking his family to Austin to stay with a friend for the weekend until electricity was restored.

The tornado was first reported at about 5:10 p.m. between the 700 and 1000 block of Twin Creek Drive in eastern Killeen. The twister went on a northwest track, uprooting trees, knocking down fences, tearing up portions of buildings, including a dry cleaner business on Rancier Avenue, before hitting the Allora Way apartment complex in the 4100 block of East Rancier Avenue. It skipped through Long Branch Park, causing minor damage.

"It just kind of bounced around," said Carroll Smith, Killeen Police Department spokesperson.

Smith said no injuries were reported.

"But there is quite a bit of damage to residences," she said.

According to the National Weather Service, the funnel cloud was spotted over Fort Hood, but as of press time no damage was reported on post.

A shelter for residents affected by the floods and tornado is at the Killeen Community Center, 2201 E. Veterans Memorial Blvd.


Saturday, May 26, 2007

Graduation

Congratulations USMA Class of 2007!

Tornado

Yesterday there was a big thunderstorm here. In the evening Andrea and I drove over to Jordan's house to watch a movie and eat pizza.  It wasn't until then that we found out we both somehow managed to miss the tornado that hit our apartment complex.  I was taking a nap and Andrea was in the shower when it tore off the chimney and brick siding off of one of the other buildings in the complex, as well as caused other damage.  Neither of us had a clue there'd been a tornado until we saw the destruction.  

Tuesday, May 08, 2007

It's Official (UNCLASSIFIED)

Classification: UNCLASSIFIED

Caveats: NONE

MSNBC News Services

 

WASHINGTON - The Pentagon has notified more than 35,000 soldiers and Marines to be prepared to deploy to Iraq beginning this fall, a move that would allow commanders to maintain the ongoing buildup of troops through the end of the year if needed.

 

The 10 brigades are: the 2nd Stryker Cavalry Regiment in Germany; the 4th Brigade, 3rd Infantry Division from Fort Stewart, Ga.; the 1st, 2nd and 3rd Brigades of the 101st Airborne Division from Fort Campbell, Ky.; the 3rd Armored Calvary Regiment from Fort Hood, Texas; the 2nd Brigade, 1st Armored from Germany; 4th Brigade, 10th Mountain Division from Fort Polk, La.; 2nd Brigade, 25th Infantry Division from Hawaii; and the 1st Brigade, 4th Infantry Division from Fort Hood, Texas.

 

Copied from: http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/18553877/

 

Looks like I’ll be spending the next two Christmas seasons in Iraq.  15 months of fun, here I come. 

Classification: UNCLASSIFIED

Caveats: NONE

Saturday, May 05, 2007

It Never Ends (UNCLASSIFIED)

Classification: UNCLASSIFIED

Caveats: NONE

I have not written very much recently because I don't have a lot to say.  When I sit down to think over my life I swing from depression about my current situation to reprimanding myself for not being grateful for the blessings and opportunities in my life.  When is the last time I really cared about something?  How long has it been since I've been either happy or sad?  I'm stuck in a middle ground of little emotion.  The faces of the people around me are tired and stressed.  People jumping through hoops to meet one demand upon another.  The workload never decreases; the day never ends; the weekend never comes.  Work 24/7/365.  Never enough time.

Classification: UNCLASSIFIED

Caveats: NONE

Thursday, May 03, 2007

Yay!

Congratulations Heidi and Kevin on your engagement! :)

Wednesday, April 25, 2007

Bored on FOB Raider

This evening marks the 1/3 of the way through point here on FOB Raider. There are two more weeks of fun left in this great field exercise. I am once again a fobit, save for when I go with my platoon on a patrol to the TUAS launch and recovery site during the day. The days are long, average at least 14-16 hours of work every day, but not jammed packed, which makes the days feel even longer. Life on the FOB is not too bad, just boring. I am trying to keep my platoon occupied with training on the Raider Big 10 and the 40 Warrior Tasks, but my soldiers would rather be flying and are rather bored most of the time with life here. We are not providing anything of value to BDE since our equipment has not returned and 3rd ACR , so instead my soldiers end up being tasked out to do details such as KP.

Adam just called. I haven't talked to him in awhile.

Tuesday, April 17, 2007

Heading to the Field

Tomorrow I head out to the field for three weeks.  I keep trying to tell myself that it's like going camping, but I have yet to convince myself.  Besides, I will most likely be spending most of my time in the brigade TOC trying to pretend like my platoon actually has equipment and is a useful asset for this training exercise.  Too bad we won't get any of our equipment back from reset until after we return from the field, so my soldiers and I who are stationed up in the TOC may be twiddling our thumbs for a bit while being yelled at for not providing any UAV coverage with the equipment we don't have.  The next few weeks should be an interesting experience to say the least. 

Friday, April 13, 2007

15 Months

15 month deployments are the new standard as of yesterday.  That's a long time to be deployed.   
 
Over there now:
Rachel
Charlie
Jordan
Phil
Ben
Brian
Austin
Dan
Leah
 
Headed over in the next few months:
Jim
Mike
Celio
 
Just to name a few off the top of my head.
 
Tired...

Wednesday, April 11, 2007

Be Thou At Peace

I found out today that another classmate, 1LT Phil Neel, '05, was killed in Iraq on 08 April 07.  I remember him most from the OCF Rocky Mountain High trip a few weeks after graduation.  He was a great guy. 
 
Well done; Be thou at peace.

Thursday, April 05, 2007

Hits Closer to Home

This evening I received a distro email update from the father one of my friends from West Point informing everyone that a few days ago my friend was out with her MP team and her team was hit by an IED (roadside bomb).  The IED killed four of her soldiers.  Even though I spent a year in Iraq and my brigade suffered losses like that at times, I didn't know any of the platoon leaders of the soldiers who died, and I didn't have a platoon of my own at the time.  What I am trying to say is that the news always hit me hard, but it wasn't as personal.  Now, I don't even want to think about what it would be like to lose one of my soldiers, let alone four.  Please pray for my friend Jordan and her platoon. 

Wednesday, April 04, 2007

The Ghostly Assemblage

On March 31st a third classmate joined the Ghostly Assemblage.


http://www.west-point.org/users/usma2005/62039/

Rest in peace
1LT Neale Shank '05.

Monday, March 26, 2007

Relaxing Saturday

Saturday was another lazy Saturday, which is exactly what I needed after the past couple of weeks. At 2pm I was still in my PJs. I woke up around 9:30am, but after getting up and eating breakfast I went back to bed for about two hours. The only activity that I did all day was going on a little over a 9.8 mile run with Jordan in the afternoon.

Last week was a three-day work week due to Monday and Friday being training holidays, but I was scheduled for Brigade Staff Duty (SDO) on Wednesday. Another officer ended up wanting to trade days with me because she had it Friday and I reluctantly agreed to switch with her. It ended up working out perfectly because I was able to have dinner with my dad on Wednesday evening. Thursday was the BN hail and farewell, after which I went to a pre-St. Patty’s day party at Christy’s house. I arrived a couple hours late and only stayed for an hour due to having staff duty the next day. Friday, of course, I had staff duty which lasted from 8am Friday morning to 8am Saturday morning (no sleep). After my shift was complete on Saturday I went home and got about four hours of sleep before some of my friends and I headed down to Austin for the Star of Texas Fair and Rodeo. It was my first time seeing a rodeo and I rather enjoyed the whole thing, though Jordan thinks they are rather cruel. Jordan, Zack, and Andrea all left before the rodeo, but Amy, Willy, Heather, and I all stayed.

This past week was my first full five-day week as a platoon leader. I am really enjoying the job and my soldiers. The issues that arise are completely different than anything I ever had to deal with as an S2, but working with soldiers is so much more enjoyable. Closeout formation is usually mid-afternoon, but most days this week I ended up staying till 6pm or 7pm for different reasons. On Thursday I was at work until 7pm, then rushed home, quickly changed my clothes, went out for a 5 mile run, came back showered, ate dinner, and went to bed. Today is the first day where I have a little time to relax and unwind.

The week wore me out because I am trying to learn my new job which involves trying to process a ton of information that is completely new to me, as well as trying to sort out my emotions on a personal matter. If only I didn’t think so deeply about things.

Monday, March 19, 2007

Yet Another Very Vauge Post

My emotions and thoughts are all over the board right now. Thursday afternoon I recieved a call from one of my friends giving me some news that normally would've been out of the blue, save for the fact that I had a dream about the exact thing a couple days or more before hand. My dream had seemed so real that a couple of times, including when I was driving to Waco to have dinner with my Dad on Wednesday, I started wondering how the people involved in the dream were handeling the situation and hoped they were doing okay because it had to be very hard on both of them. Then, I would remember that it was just a dream. Needless to say, when I learned the news that it shocked me and all I could say was, "wow," over and over again. My friend who told me the news made me promise to not mention it to anyone, so my usual method/outlet of sorting through my emotions and thoughts aloud to my friends is not avaliable. On Friday I had BDE staff duty, which left me far too much time to think and ponder the situation. The whole day I felt like I was in emotional shock and also wanted to curl up in a ball and cry, but of course that was not an option. Instead I spent a lot of time staring off into space and probably looked very tired and worn-out.

I have no idea why I am reacting the way I am to the news. I guess when people you really care about are hurting you hurt too. It's also bringing back a lot of memories from the past year and I feel like I'm going through the same struggle that I went through at the end of October and not knowing the outcome of it all, wondering what God has planned in all of this, wondering if there is any hope for me in the future, yet feeling bad for wondering that at a time like this.

Wednesday, March 14, 2007

Running for Peace of Mind

If I didn't think so much I would have a lot less drama and frustration in my life. Yesterday I planned to go for a 5 mile run, but after I reached the turn around point I stopped and watched the sun setting for a bit and then walked back to the apartment. It was while I was walking back that I realized that when I run I don't think very much. In fact, usually what happens is one line of the most recent song that I've listened to repeats itself over and over again in my head the entire run. Instead of being annoying I find it helps me concentrate on running. I find it nearly impossible to think deeply while running. I say all this because the other 99% of my life I spend contemplating things that more often than not are things that I do not need to spend hours upon hours over-analyzing. I wish I could turn off my mind and not think so much sometimes.

I'd write more, but it's getting late. Guten nacht.

Wednesday, February 28, 2007

Above 300

This morning my company had a diagnostic PT test and I maxed the PT test for the first time in my life :)
 
Push-ups: 54 (108 pts)
Sit-ups: 81 (101 pts)
Run: 14:54 (107 pts)
Total = 316 points on the extended scale (which technically does not exist). 
 
After the PT test I went out and ran another 2 miles with a 9:30/mile pace and felt fine, which means that I did not push myself hard enough during the PT test. 

Saturday, February 24, 2007

Randomness...

I only had to work four days this past week due to Monday being Presidents Day, but it still felt like a long week. In order to unwind and relax a bit this evening I baked peanut-butter chewies and chocolate-caramel brownies. Tomorrow I am planning on making some caramel corn as well as some oatmeal chocolate chip cookies and put the baked goods in bags to give to Phil and Ben on Sunday. They both are deploying to Afghanistan in a few days and Sunday will most likely be the last time I see them for a while. I will miss those guys.

Last Sunday after Church Mike invited me to fly to a Todd Agnew concert that evening with him, Ben, and Phil, but sadly it ended up not working out for me to go. I'm trying my best to keep myself grounded in reality and not get my hopes up about anything, but some stuff Phil said and asked me this evening on the phone is making it really hard, like when out of the blue he and Ben wanted to know why Mike and I aren't dating yet. "Strength arises, wait upon the Lord..." Good song.

One morning earlier this week I got a call from a fellow S2 asking if I knew where my roommate was because she hadn't shown up to PT or to work that day. I'd seen Andrea when I got up for PT, but left before her assuming that she would be following shortly. Therefore, when I got the phone call it concerned me that she hadn't been seen by anyone else. I almost called Jordan to ask if she had seen Andrea, but then remembered that they are in the same BN and so of course Jordan wouldn't know anything more than I did. It turns out Andrea had a briefing and had informed the proper person that she would be gone, but it had slipped their mind. I am writing about this in here because it reminded me of an incident that occurred while in Iraq. One day a report came over the systems about an IED strike that resulted in a soldier killed in Tarmiyah. I remembered Jordan mentioning the night before that she was going to Tarmiyah the next day and the KIA was from her BN and in the vicinity of where she was supposed to go, so I became worried that it might be her because the battle roster number of the soldier hadn’t come through yet. I was too scared to call Jordan’s work phone because I didn’t want to hear from them that she was actually in Tarmiyah, so instead I called Andrea and asked her if she knew if Jordan was on the patrol that got hit. Andrea informed that it was a different platoon and Jordan was still safe and sound back at Taji. That evening Jordan stopped by my room to make fun of me for calling Andrea instead of her, and still hasn’t let me forget the whole thing, but I don’t care because I’m glad she is alive and safe. I guess I connected the two incidents because I found it amusing that this time I was ready to call Jordan due to worrying about Andrea.

Are the paragraph breaks working? They don't appear to be at the moment.

Sunday, February 18, 2007

Ripe Pineapple

While in Iraq I ate pineapple almost every morning for breakfast. The man at the fruit stand got to know know me so well that he would see me walking up and start chopping up the pineapple before I even reached the stand. Now that I am home I occasionally buy a pineapple at the grocery store, but I've run into the problem of not knowing how to tell if a pineapple is ripe and sweet. This evening I was at the store and once again standing in front of the pineapples trying to come up with my own method of determining what characteristics meant a pineapple was sweet. I suddenly remembered that one of my friends is from Hawaii, so I gave him a call in hopes that he might know more about the subject. He and I had planned to hang out last night because we hadn't really seen each other since august or September, but for some reason that didn't happen. Sad :(

I digress.... Anyway he didn't answer the phone this evening and so I was left clueless about pineapples. Eventually I decided upon a particular pineapple due to it's pinkish hue. Now that I am home I looked up the question on Google and found the site http://www.ehow.com/how_1679_choose-slice-pineapple.html that gives advice on choosing a pineapple. I wish I had know the advice when I was at the store.

Monday, February 12, 2007

Weekend Synopsis

There are so many things I could write and have thought about writing over this past week, but right now I I do not particularly feel like writing about any of them.
 
I was hoping to spend the weekend lounging around the apartment, but I was at work until 8 pm on Friday working on a slideshow and waiting for keys.  Then, on Saturday I went down to Austin with Andrea and Jordan to go dress shopping for a dress for Jordan for valentine's day.  Andrea had a mall in mind that she wanted to go to, but after driving for three hours and stopping twice at gas stations for directions, she gave up finding the mall and we headed back to the outlet mall in Round Rock.  I was hopping to buy a skirt for myself, but quickly gave up on that idea.  We did not manage to find a dress for Jordan, but each of us bought a few things.  I came away with two new tops.  Going shopping with Jordan and Andrea made me feel better about my own clothes shopping woes because we all have trouble finding clothes that fit properly, especially when it comes to pants, skirts, and dresses.  Recently I've managed to find a style of top that works well for my body type, but as far as the other half of my outfit, if I find an article of clothing that fits one area of my body it likely will not fit another portion properly.  What women out there, besides young teenage girls, have the same size waist and hips/thighs????  I am not a guy!   Okay, enough of my ranting and raving on that subject. 
 
This afternoon I decided to take a break from working on the slide show for my BN ball and go for a run.  Since I wasn't very motivated to go out and run, but yet still wanted to get the exercise I gave Jordan a call to see if she wanted to go running.  She happened to be at the mall doing some more dress shopping.  I made her promise that if I went there to help her shop she would then go running with me.  Unfortunately, we were not any more successful today with dresses, but thankfully she has a few back home already that could work if need be.  After shopping we went for about a 4.25 mile run near her neighborhood.  She invited Andrea and I to eat dinner with her and Zack, so when we got back from our run she taught me how to make stewed tomatoes while she made tacos.  Zack learned the stewed tomatoes recipe in Iraq from some local nationals.  I actually liked the stewed tomatoes and the recipe is very healthy, so Andrea and I may add it to our repertoire. 
 
The hardest thing for me this weekend was giving up going to Grace Bible Church.  I got an email from Betsy on Friday that pretty much summed up what I was experiencing.  Andrea and I have been talking recently about obedience to God and how He has used peoples obedience to bless them.  Abraham's obedience to God in being willing to sacrifice Isaac kept coming to mind, as well as the phrase "and He was obedient, even unto death on the cross..." referring to Jesus.  I felt like this was something God was calling me to do in obedience to Him.  Giving up going to GBC is hardly the same as either of those two things, but it has been really hard because I really liked the people there and I was making some new friends.  Phil and I ended up talking this afternoon and he asked where I had gone to Church today because he goes to GBC.  I told him the whole thing, as well as my frustration with not feeling at home or a sense of peace at the church I ended up going to this morning (Holy Family).  He said obedience isn't always easy, which is very true.  I'm glad he talked to me about that instead of trying to convince me to go back to GBC. 
 
Lindsay called me on Saturday night and she told me that if I sign up for the San Diego Marathon on June 3rd that she'll run it with me.  I am seriously considering it because I want to run a marathon and I also want to see her again.  She's an '04 USNA grad who is in the marines.  We became friends while attending the Anti-terrorism/Force Protection course together back in July in Baghdad.  We mostly talk about running and guys, though other topics are occasionally discussed. 

Sunday, February 04, 2007

Jitters

I am extremely jittery and I don't know why.  Perhaps this is what happens now when I don't do much physical activity for two days.  It started during the Bible Study before the church service when we were discussing the Church as a whole.  I find I get very excited about studying/discussing theology and, though our discussion was quite basic, it got the wheels in my mind turning at an extremely fast rate because I wanted to dig deeper but couldn't.  I think I am currently so hungry for any type of spiritual discussion in person that even the hint of it gets me going, though I do not know why I actually ended up with the jitters.  During the service I have to admit that I barely paid attention to the sermon because I was thinking about the Bible study, searching through the Bible, and jotting thoughts down on paper.  A few times I ended up putting my head down and praying for peace so that I could concentrate.  After the service I went home and found that I could not stand still, so I went for a 6.4 mile run to calm me down.  I'm hoping to break the 9 min/mile mark on my longer runs soon, but today I averaged a 9.07 min/mile.  The run worked for about an hour, but now the jitters are returning.  When I was walking out after church today Mike invited me to a Super Bowl party at his house.  I hope that I manage to be a bit more calm by the time I go over there. 
 
On a random side note, the word dichotomy  has been running through my head since this morning.  I don't recall hearing it used anytime recently, so I do not know why I keep thinking about it. 

Talking About Talking

Some people love talking and have trouble listening.  I have the opposite trouble, especially in groups.  It is extremely common for me to be in a group of people who are talking and listen intently to the ongoing conversation and be perfectly content without even realizing that I haven't said a word throughout the whole thing.  Of course, the rare times that I do feel the urge to add my two cents to a conversation I find that I am so focused on trying to get a word in that I stop listening as intently and then get annoyed if I can not find the opportunity to speak.  I am usually much more talkative one-on-one, although I am also probably worse at listening one-on-one. It is usually dependent on the other person and their talkativeness.  If they like to talk a lot, I'll let them talk and just listen.  If they don't talk at all then I probably will not talk very much either.  I probably sound like goldilocks right now, but I'm comparing talking instead of porridge or beds.  Goodness.  Perhaps I enjoy writing on here because I have the ability to talk as much or as little as I want without interruptions and also spend most of the time doing my most common activity: over-analyzing myself.
 
In Iraq I discovered that when I try and multi-task my ability to hear decreases.  I didn't realize that until the potty-mouth contest started the last month of the deployment and someone would be shouting a swear word in the TOC, but I would be so wrapped up in what I was doing that I wouldn't hear a word.  MAJ P was actually the one to point it out because he had thought I had really good hearing until I started the contest.  The truth is that I didn't hear 75% of the things said or discussed by the guys, but I would read their body language as well as the obvious fact that they were whispering to each other and pick up that they were making some sort of less than wholesome comment. 
 
This post is truly pointless and I have no idea why I stayed up writing it. 
 
Best moment of the week:  Finding out I am going to be the UAV platoon leader.
Worst moment of the week:  unlike last week, one single moment doesn't stand out. 

Battle With A Cold

Just the other day I was congratulating myself on staying healthy for almost a year without even a cold. Now it is up in the air whether or not my healthy streak will last any longer.
 
Last night I went to bed with great plans to ride my bike and go running today, but this morning I woke up and realized that I was in the beginning stages of fighting a cold.  Around noon I went to go pick up my uniform and then headed to the store to by some supplies to make Heidi's chicken soup recipe.  The errands wore me out and I spent the rest of the afternoon on the couch watching TV after having made the soup.  Currently I'm debating how to spend this evening because I was planning on going to church and then Maj P's promotion party, but I don't think I have enough energy to do both of those things.  I don't actually feel that sick, but I can tell I am not completely well because I have absolutely no desire to go out and ride my bike or run, and it is a beautiful day outside for doing both of those things.  All I want to do is curl up in my bed.  Hopefully the chicken soup, lack of activity, and medicine that Andrea gave me will strangle this cold before it gets past this beginning stage and I'll be completely healthy tomorrow. 

Friday, February 02, 2007

Thursday, February 01, 2007

New PR

Today was the first time in my life that I swam a mile. I started swimming when I got back from block leave, but didn't have a set swim workout until last week when I came across the site Zero to 1650 in Six Weeks. Swimming a mile has always sounded like an incredibly far distance to me, especially since I was averaging a little under 1000 yds with plenty of (long) breaks and variations in strokes. I looked at the Zero to 1650 plan and it seemed almost possible, so last Wednesday I decided to start it.

Since I'd already been swimming for a couple weeks I advanced myself to week three of the program, but unfortunately failed to realize that the repeat is in addition to the first swim, so instead of 1350 yds I only swam 1150 yds, but swam more consecutive laps than I had in many years. Then, on Friday I was a bit tired and decided to skip my noon swim. On Monday I moved on to week four of the program and this time counted the repeats correctly, thus completing 1500 yds with a few breathing breaks. The program has you repeat the same workout three times before moving on to the next week, so my plan today was to repeat Monday's workout.

I started swimming the first 600 yds and after 100 yds I realized I felt pretty decent, most likely because I had a dentist appointment this morning and so did not participate in PT. After a few more laps I had talked myself in to skipping ahead to the very last day of the program and going for the full mile without stopping and utilizing only the freestyle swimming stroke. I was more focused on completing the mile then on speed so I found a slow and steady breathing rhythm that I was able to keep up the entire time. I ended up completing 1650 yds in around 47 minutes, but then swam an extra 100 yds for good measure and finished in 50 minutes. The whole time I using the same motivation techniques by counting down the yards like I used to do with the meters while on the erg or during a race. In fact, in my mind I even saw the computer screen on the erg but instead of having the distance of a 2k or a 6k, it was my swimming distance.

After work today I was driving home and saw that the sun had not yet set, so I decided that I'd try pushing myself a bit more today, and also try and relieve some stress and frustration, by going for a run and timing myself on a 3.86 mile loop. Since I had already swam further than ever before in my life I was not sure if my time would be as good as I'd like, but I ended up with a PR of 33:28, or 8:41 min/mile. Of course, it was only the second time I've done that specific loop, but my first time I averaged 8:53.9 min/mile. That probably sounds fairly slow to most people, but for me with that distance it is a decent pace. One thing I do have to learn how to do is pace myself. I start out fairly fast for the first mile, then slow down to a slower pace that I maintain for most of the run, but pick it up again at the very end. I'd probably do a lot better if I started out slower and picked up the pace later on.

Tuesday, January 30, 2007

Confused Doesn't Even Begin to Describe Me

I am a Lutheran who is lead to attend a non-denominational Church yet also called to become Catholic.  Something has to be wrong here.  Argh!

Sunday, January 28, 2007

WWW.HowToDiceAnOnion

The internet is great.  I am quite cooking illiterate even though I love baking.  Andrea is making a sauerkraut casserole for dinner tonight, but neither of us were sure how to dice an onion, so I looked it up online and found a nifty instructional video at http://www.chow.com/stories/10134
 
Last night Derrick and Cara hosted a Mexican fiesta reunion of the Tigris River Chapel praise team and chaplains.  I really enjoyed seeing everyone again after almost three months, and it was neat meeting their spouses and families.  I was truly blessed to be able to spend time with such an amazing group of people in Iraq.  I don't think I stopped smiling the entire evening. 

Friday, January 26, 2007

The Week Tastes Like Vegetables

This week has been akin to me eating vegetables when I was little.  I was told the vegetables were good for me, but I sure didn't like the taste of them. (Sometimes I spit them into my napkin, although I usually reserved the napkin trick to get rid of my glass of milk.  Shh...don't tell my Mom).  The week has been full of things that are probably good for me and will help me grow and mature in the long run, but they are very uncomfortable to deal with right now.  More specifically, yesterday I had two extremely embarrassing moments, one of which was so embarrassing that I was tempted to never show my face in public again.  However, my Dad has always said that a sign of maturity is the ability to laugh at yourself, so I did my best to laugh at myself and also gave a few other people something to laugh about.  Some of the other things this week relate to hopes being deferred and, in the process, working on patience.  I sure hope I am doing the right thing by not acting and being patient in one of the circumstances, because otherwise I will probably look pretty funny as I try and kick myself if I find out that inaction was the wrong action.  Vague, yes.  Why?  Because elephants have flat feet. 

Thursday, January 25, 2007

One More Has Fallen

My prayers are with the family and friends of 1st Lt. Jacob N. Fritz, West Point  class of 2005.
 

Wednesday, January 24, 2007

Random Email

    Today I received an email stating, "You have been identified as a potential instructor for the Department of Mathematical Sciences at the United States Military Academy, West Point.  If selected, you would be given two years of fully-funded (and full time) graduate school with a follow on three-year assignment to West Point in the Department of Mathematical Sciences."  I am wondering how my name ended up on the email list since it wasn't a mass email to all of my class, though I have no clue how many other people received it.  Probably a fair number received it as well.  I can't even remember how I did in my math classes.  Strange.

Does Anyone Love Their Job?

This morning I was planning and looking forward to going for a faster, longer run with one of my fellow LT's during PT.  My plan fell through due to a new policy and I ended up not being able to go for a run at all.  Since I went swimming yesterday I didn't due any PT during lunch, but decided I still wanted to go for a run after work at 5pm.  I was really looking forward to the run, but then a meeting with the officers in my section took a while and the sun had already set by the time I got home.  My attitude became worse and worse during the meeting because I realized that I wouldn't be able to go for a run, and though I was not verbally saying anything it still showed on my face.  I was both angry about not being able to go for a run, and also angry at myself for having a bad attitude about having to stay a little later. 
 
I got home in a bad mood and after Andrea came home we had a little venting session.  My mood was still not very good when a few friends showed up later on for the first meeting of a Bible study that Andrea is leading.  This evening we only looked over the Bible study for a bit to familiarize ourselves with it and then talked about work for about an hour, but my attitude is a lot better now after the Bible study.  I do have one question though.  Can anyone name someone in the Army who actually loves their job?  I asked this to Andrea and to the other people who came tonight and sadly no one could name a single person.  A few did say that they really enjoyed PL time, but none of them are PL's anymore.  I'd like to meet someone who whole-heartedly loves their job and looks forward to going in to work everyday.  Perhaps that person could inspire me to love my job instead of bear it in the hopes of something better coming along soon. 

Monday, January 22, 2007

A Wonderful Day

I wish I could press the stop button on today and rewind it so that I could relive it over again and again. I am probably making far too much out of this day and I will realize that sometime in the near future, but for now while the emotion and excitement is still fresh and full of possibility it seems like a completely wonderful day. I will now proceed to rehash the day down to the minute details.

To start off with, the day was beautiful and in the low 60's which, after a week of rain and freezing temperatures, was a welcome change. Earlier this week Phil invited me to go to Church with him and I agreed because the Church was on my list of Churches that I wanted to check out. I wasn't able to make it to the Bible study portion before the service due to having SDO duty yesterday, but I made it in time for the 10:30 service. At the church I ran into my friend Willy who I know from OCF at West Point, and his wife Amy who I met when Willy was in processing into Fort Hood last December. I chatted with them until Phil came in from the Bible study. With him was his friend Mike. Phil had mentioned Mike a couple times over the week, but I hadn't realized that Mike would be at church, which is probably a good thing for me to not have known ahead of time. We all sat down together and a few minutes later Ben, Mikes roommate and Phil's friend, and Ben's girlfriend, Danica, joined us. I was sitting in-between Mike and Phil and during the greeting portion of the service Mike told me that I had a very beautiful voice.

After the service Phil, Mike and I were talking together and Mike mentioned that he was going flying today and asked if either of us would like to go. It sounded very cool and I had never been in a small plane before so I wanted to go, but Phil had other activities he wanted to do. All of us, Ben and Danica included, ended up going out to lunch at a nearby deli that is a very popular after-church gathering place to eat. Mike choose to sit on the end of the table next to me even though there were two or three other open seats on the other side of the table. I wasn't sure if I was still invited flying since Phil didn't want to go and Mike and only just met me, but Ben and Danica were also going flying and Phil's not going didn't seem to even be an issue to Mike about whether or not I was invited.

When we all arrived at the local airport Danica asked me if I had met Mike before today, and I suddenly realized that there I was spending an afternoon with three people who were close friends with each other, but I who I had never met before in my life. The really strange thing was that I didn't feel as extremely shy as I normally would under those circumstances. Most likely because they were all very friendly...and we had all gone to West Point and so had something in common.

Due to the airplane being fully fueled it could only carry three people at first, so Ben opted to stay on the ground while Mike took Danica and I up. It was awesome flying around and Danica and I had a wonderful time. At one point he asked me if, when I got up this morning, I had imagined I would be flying around in plane this afternoon. The thought had never even remotely crossed my mind. After about 30 minutes we landed to see if Ben wanted to come along because enough fuel had been burnt off. Before we took off Ben had said that he and Danica weren't going to stay very long and Mike offered that after that they left he could take me up in the plane again. Ben opted not to go up in the plane at all and so he and Danica left after the flight. Mike repeated his offer to take me up again and I readily agreed. He also asked me if I'd like to learn how to fly the plane this time since it was just the two of us. Shortly after we took off he gave me a few instructions on what to do and then let me take control of the plane. I ended up flying the plane for about an hour, though a couple of times he stepped in to help. Twice he referenced us going flying together again sometime in the future. One reference was to us going flying at night so that he could show me how beautiful the lights are. The other reference was that next time he'll have a specific destination in mind, most likely because I had asked if there was anything really interesting to see where we were flying and he couldn't think of anything.

After we landed and Mike was tying up the plane I happened to see Derrick, so I yelled to him and he came over to say hi. I introduced them to each other and we exchanged pleasantries.

As Mike and I were saying goodbye he told me that I could call and ask him to go flying with him anytime and he would always say yes:) When I got back to the apartment Andrea was about to take off on a bike ride, so I quickly changed my clothes and joined her. My original plan for the afternoon had been to go for a run followed by a bike ride, but the invitation from Mike to go flying had changed everything. Being able to still get in a 14 mile bike ride was quite nice. The weather was perfect for both flying and bike riding.

I called Phil later in the evening because he had mentioned wanting Mike and I to meet and I wanted to tell him how great the day had been. Who knows if Mike and I will actually ever go flying again, but today sure was amazing. The wonderful day ended with Andrea and I having a fire in our fireplace and making s'mores :)

Sunday, January 21, 2007

Good Service Is A Bad Thing?

 Phil and I have gone out to eat twice this week and both times the service was exceptionally fast and good.  In fact, the service has been so good that after this last time we were trying to think of places that would be more crowded so that our service would be slower.  We both knew the idea of it all was quite backwards, but both times we went out to eat we had to turn our waitresses away multiple times before we were ready to order.  Had we sat down and decided what to order before starting to talk there wouldn't be an issue, but our problem is that we start talking before we are ready to order.  Our waiter/waitress, seeing us in deep conversation and no longer looking at the menu, comes by because he/she thinks we are ready to order.  We then have to send him/her away and get back to looking over the menu.  That only lasts a minute or two before the menu is forgotten and we get caught up in another topic of conversation.  I think the the process repeated itself about four times both times we went out to eat.   What's more, even at Starbucks the coffees were made exceptionally fast, although Phil already knew what he was getting and I ended up getting the drink that the guy behind the counter recommended, so we didn't run into the ordering problem there.  That is not to imply that the service is usually slow at Starbucks. Starbucks happened to be the location of the place where we were discussing our good service problem and so it is lumped in with the other two instances. 

Wednesday, January 17, 2007

Snow!

Last night it snowed here in Texas.  There is only a slight dusting on the ground and it is a rather icy snow, but it is snow none the less.  I may post pictures later.  I feel a bit better having seen a tiny bit of snow this year. 

Tuesday, January 16, 2007

MLK Weekend

This weekend was a bit more productive than last weekend even though it rained three out of the four days. The weekend started with us having a fire in the fireplace and reading by the light of the fire and candle light while occasionally discussing what it must have been like to live back when those were the only methods by which to produce light at night. It was very relaxing.

On Friday, Andrea and I drove Austin to visit the Bicycle Sport Shop there, making it my third trip in one week. I had an appointment for my bike fitting and she ended up purchasing a mountain bike. Later that day, during a break in the rain, we went out for a 10 mile bike ride.

Saturday was not a very productive day at all. We were hoping to go for another bike ride, but it did not stop raining all day. I can't remember if either of us actually left the apartment. Oh wait, we made a trip out to go to target, Wal-Mart, and Circuit City. In the evening I made some gingerbread cookies.

On Sunday I, surprisingly, attended Temple Bible Church for a second time. I liked the service a lot better this week, most likely because last week there was a guest speaker. After Church I made some chocolate-caramel brownies to send to Rachel and Jordan along with the gingerbread cookies.

This morning I woke up and, for the first time in three days, did not hear any rain. When I looked outside the first time I did not have my contacts in and so it looked completely dry. Once I put in my contacts and looked again I saw that in fact everything was covered in a coat of ice. I guess there was an ice storm last night. Instead of going for a run, which was what I was originally planning to do when I woke up, I instead made whole-wheat pancakes for breakfast. Later on I did go for just short of a 6-mile run because the ground was quite dry, it was just the trees and parked cars that were covered in ice. I was planning on having a lazy evening at home, but one of my company-mates from West Point, Phil, unexpectedly contacted me and wanted to hang out. We planned to meet at Starbucks, but got there and found it closed, so instead we went back to his place and caught each other up on our lives over the past 18 months. I was very surprised at some of the similarities in our lives. We probably could've talked for a few more hours, but instead I said goodbye after two hours so that I could get back and make some chocolate-caramel brownies to bring in to work tomorrow.

Having two of my former company-mates, first Chris over leave, and then Phil today, contact me out of the blue was a pleasant surprise. I hadn't seen either of them since graduation and I really enjoyed being able to spend time with both of them again. Phil was my platoon sergeant when I was a platoon leader firstie year and Chris as a squad leader in our platoon.